Saturday, December 04, 2004

alternative appendicitis and the winning wave

this is a somewhat backdated entry. the seeds of thought were there a few nights ago, and i jotted down a few notes, but now can't quite fully recall the precise details relating to the brief notes.

anyways... thursday felt like a not-so-good day. as i said i can't remember exactly why - there was definitely more than one factor, but i can only recall one of them. maybe the other was related as well. yeah, i think it was. so anyways i find out on thursday that this whole outsourcing/restructure thing which was announced like two and half months ago (and which was supposed to take place within eight weeks) is still dragging on as far as my particular role was concerned. my role/job function is now not going to be transitioned for another month...


i'm finding it hard enough dragging myself out of bed every morning, tossing up whether or not i should just call in sick and not bother with the whole thing. i feel so much like an appendix - an appendage hanging on all by itself, sitting there doing who knows what day after day. to most people it may seem rather useless and devoid of any real function, but having the potential to cause great pain and distress should it be inflamed. as i said, i am ready to go at the drop of a hat... i just don't have a good hat yet. maybe one with pop-out blades hidden in the rim that i can use as an uber-shuriken... and lined with explosive powder that detonates on impact, just as i stroll casually away from the building, out of reach of the flames and projectiles... !

so back to thursday. i'm not happy. this news doesn't help. and as i was leaving work for the day (don't get me wrong, i do still turn up to work and do my work. at the same time i'll freely admit that i'm mostly operating on a "doing the minimum" mindset...), my manager catches me and apologises for the delay in my transition. it's not really his fault per se... but that doesn't stop the whole situation from being just a bit of a "good idea at the time but did anybody actually bother to plan and manage it properly???" that it currently is. and he comments that he notices that i've been a bit out of sorts lately... which got me thinking whether it was so obvious? i suppose i'm struggling to keep a lid on it sometimes... he said he doesn't want me to one day say to him that i've had enough and throw in the towel, that i should look forward to the new role (which i'm not really, but it's probably better than this dead-end road i'm currently on), that i should try to prove myself there etc etc. i then let him know why i'm not looking forward to the new role, and why i doubt that proving myself will result in anything (since i have already done so in my current role, and got nothing to show for it except malcontent and disillusionment). i think he resigned himself to agreeing with me, especially since he's only been here a few months and i've seen and heard more of how this place works than he has.

i went home. wanted to vege and do nothing, so had a bit of idiot boxing lined up. to my pleasant surprise, i had some winning moments:
  1. my cheque from opionionspaid came! i had "won" some money from doing their surveys... i suppose if you actually calculate how much time i spent on completing the surveys vs. how much money i got from it, it would probably work out to be a not very efficient way of getting money :p
  2. while getting ready to wash up the night's dishes, i turned on the radio to 96.5 (which is something i tend to do whenever i wash dishes), and within a minute or two heard something about a movie ticket giveaway, so i rang the station. didn't get through the first time and fiddled for a few seconds with the home phone to get the last number redial happening. thought i'd lost the opportunity cos it took me 2 or 3 goes to get it right, but the second call started ringing! and i got through... and won myself 4 tickets to a preview of the new hilary duff movie, raise your voice. lol... the guy asked if i was a fan, and i said not really :p but hey, a free movie is a free movie, and while this is probably not something i'd usually pay to go see, it also isn't something i'd avoid like the plague. actually, having spent some time looking through the site, i think i might enjoy the music in it at least :) so now all i need is to find some friends who might also enjoy such fare, and treat them to a free movie.

- - - - -

well now that i've gotten that out of my head, time to eat and get ready to make some dumplings later this afternoon! this will be my first real attempt at doing things from go to whoa - previously i've only assisted here and there when my parents were driving the show. i don't really have a proper recipe either... some helpers will come later to wrap and cook, so fingers crossed my preparation of ingredients doesn't go too badly (i'm not much of a cook, so i worry when i don't have precise directions!) anyways, if they turn out looking anything like these (not that i'm following her recipe/directions that closely), i'll be happy :D

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