a recent episode of lost tells the story of a guy who has spent a long time being secretly in love with his step sister. eventually the truth outs, and she (who has known/suspected for some time) continues to use that to her advantage. anyways he ends up having this "experience" which compels him to let go of what he's been hanging on to, and the next time the two interact and she tries to coerce him to do something by turning on her smile and wily words, he is able to easily say no.
she looks surprised at the response.
my point? don't have one... but notice that while i can identify with the ease of saying no where the decision may have previously been not so cut and dried, i also see that i 偶而会想念，从未拥有的.
maybe it's me who's truly lost :p